October 7, 2013 by Beth Hess
In any given situation, I get a lot of feedback on the next appropriate action steps — from inside my own head.
Good Girl always wants to follow the rules. No Filter Girl would rather let somebody have a piece of her mind. Insecure Girl wonders why people don’t like her. Ignore It Girl pretends it will all go away on its own. Feed It Girl figures it will feel better after a snack — or lots of snacks.
These opinions — and more — argue for control around the conference table of my mind. Some yell. Some whine. Some cry. Some curse. One of the loud and whiny ones usually gets her way.
But there is another voice in the crowd. The one who puts things in perspective. The one who speaks quietly mostly, but the truth always. The one who can see the bigger picture. The one who remembers the faith journey we’re all on. The one who focuses on love. She sees the best in people. She knows there is a plan. She trusts her Jesus.
I call her Grace.
The days I quiet the other Girls enough to hear what Grace has to say aren’t always days I follow her lead. She is not yet the first to get my attention. But she’s polite enough to stick around and wait for me to be ready.
Today was one of those days with more punches than I was able to bob and weave away from. Any one of which would have been easily deflected but the bulk of which leave you breathless. An early shot to the gut, and I was gasping for air all day.
And when you can’t catch your breath, it’s hard to tell the Girls to quiet down. So Grace did it for me. Grace repeated to me the words of truth from my morning devotions and worship-music drive time. Grace convinced Feed It Girl that food was not a solution and made sure No Filter Girl stopped to think before she spoke. Grace extended her hand to lift Insecure Girl from the mat and assured Good Girl that doing the right thing is still the right thing even if it doesn’t get the hoped for results.
Grace took me here: “The Spirit of God has made me, And the breath of the Almighty gives me life.” (Job 33:4) to remind me that finding my breath is not my job anyway.
Today I listened to Grace. Tomorrow, I pray, she will lead me again.