October 1, 2014 by Beth Hess
I wish I could say that I got free from sugar and other addicting food habits 20 years ago. But I didn’t. So all I have is now.
Yes, it’s disheartening to be starting again. Once again.
I’ve known for most of my life that food is my go-to pleasure. My comforter when I’m stressed. My party friend when I’m celebrating. My secret when I’m ashamed. My indulgence when I don’t care any more.
And at various times in my 40 years, I’ve known I want to be on a different path. Diets. Exercise. Fasting. Prayer. Counting points. Eliminating food groups. Reading labels. Cutting food in half. Cleaning out my pantry. Stuffing myself on Sunday to get ready for a fresh start on Monday.
A long drawn-out cycle of binge and purge.
Admittedly, I’m only a little confident this can be my last restart. I don’t have a great history of keeping it up. I have fought the battle so many times only to hand the bloodied ground back over to the enemy and return to my foxhole to lick the wounds. (And the frosting off a cupcake.) Staring at the battleground again is daunting. My scars, they itch and twitch with the knowledge of the frustration and sacrifice sure to be coming.
And yet I go forward. Because I have no other choice. Because I have never been more sure that the mountain of victory is on the other side of this fight. And I refuse to live one more minute of my life in defeat.
Knowing I’m sharing this with you all through #Write31Days is both vulnerable and invigorating. I am not anxious to show off my wounds. But it’s good to have friends in the foxhole.
In response to the 31 Day blogging challenge, I will be publishing EVERY DAY in October while I stay sugar-free. You can read previous posts HERE. To be alerted to new posts, please follow me on Facebook or Twitter using the links on the right side of this page. Feel free to Tweet your own experiences with #sugarsoberoctober as well.
PLEASE use the comment section to share your own thoughts, questions, or experiences. Like any road, sugar sobriety is one more easily walked with friends. I do my best to reply to every comment.